Questions

Does this darkness have a name?

This cruelty this hatred

How did it find us?

Did it steal into our lives or did we seek it out and embrace it?

What happened to us?

That we now send our children out to the world like we send young men to war;

Hoping for their safe return, but know that some would be lost along the way

When did we lose our way?

Consumed by our shadows and swallowed whole by the darkness

Does this darkness have a name?

Is it your name?

                                      

Love tries to kill me

There is no place for the broken hearted or the lost and insufficient.

No fairy-tale land where dreams may come.

No affirmation to those seeking answers to questions long lost.

The tortured and insecure hide in pain inside a room of grievously lost hope.

No place to go when things get hard, or to run to your land of good things when all is lost to you.

Only you are trapped in the circle of guilt and insufficient morrow inside your chest.

Bleeding out such passions to which you long to hold.

They sift away as the sand running through your clutched hands as you plead for some semblance to stay with you.

They left you...

Barren, empty and dry.

                                                                          

reach not

Let loose the things that you hold dear, friend.

For with the dealings of close passion comes the disappointment of rejected loves.

Saving yourself from the reality of cruel fate and its ironic composure upon our lives.

To hold in those urges to let loose your faults into another's care.

People always leave.. 

And the reality of such truths will hopefully stay your hand.

Because the moment you let loose your demons, is the moment those you though were close to you

Behave such as strangers. 

No one, not a single life at all truly will care for you in careless love.

Everything is conditional.

And those you once thought were to be with you always

Are forever lost to you.

Only in your mind can you touch that which you seek.

What a foul thing the imagine plays upon our hearts...

                     

the befalling of tragedy

“There are two tragedies in life.

One is to loss your hearts desire; the other is to gain it.”

 

 

 

As we strain to grasp the things we desire; the things we think will make our lives better.

Money, fame.

We ignore the things that truly matter; the simple things like friendship, family.

 

Love.

     &

Things we probably already had.

 

Yes, losing your hearts desire is tragic, but to gain that which you seek is all u can hope for.

 To wish for love. To immerse yourself in someone else and to wake a heart long afraid to feel.

 

And, when your heart breaks u have to fight the sorrows that swallow your heart and the feeling of hell’s dominion over your desire’s delivery.

To stay alive, because you are.

That pain you feel, that’s life.

That confusion and fear, that’s there to remind you that something better is out there for you and that something is worth fighting for.

                                           

 

to be lost

“Let us drop these bread crumbs so that together we can find our way home, because to lose ourselves would be the most cruel of things.”

 

 

I lost my way.

And although losing your way on a journey is unfortunate, losing your reason for the journey is a fate more cruel.

A journey of endless time that would be my life in repetition to my thoughts, and sometimes I traveled alone. Sometimes there were others that took the wheel and took my heart.

But when the destination was reached it wasn’t me who arrived.

It wasn’t me at all.

And once you lose yourself, you have two choices.

Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely.

Because sometimes you have to step outside of the person you’ve been and remember the person you were meant to be.

The person you wanted to be.

The person you are…

                                      

to be there

Lord be there this night.
Be and do what i wish i could.

Heal the hurts and the sorrow.
God take away the griefs and pains of this life.

Father give her worth.
Give her purpose.

Give her love, the likes of which only you can.
God be where i can't and make her whole.

Jesus be with her and hold her as i long to do.

Take care of her Lord, because i can not..

Father she feels so alone, so lost.
So full of doubt that to end the day is a relief.

The emptiness inside her heart shrouds it such darkness
that to even see the light inside would be as to grab at the fog on the morning of restless

unease.

Love her Lord before it is too late.

                                                

living in its moments of trust

The life you live is but one chance, and the decisions set before you are yours to experience.
Right and left, too and fro.

Yet that those decisions don't define you, those decisions domino on the ones around you and shape character in their sight; however moral or irrational that perception may be.
Hate and love, fear and bravery.

Perseverance is not just a word or a definition, but a way to which we live.
picking up the pieces and doing what makes you your person.

What a life it would be if it were to be just the simplistic value of completeness.
No wrong decisions, no regrets to dread..

Yet those moments that tear you apart or give you joy if only for a moment: 
are the moments that give you freedom and the right of passage to live.

And that which we claim to be living in our own perspective is ours to decide, and whether in sadness, regret, or happiness in its fleeting fashion.

You and I decide what we think to be true and right for ourselves.

Everyone else is just hoping what we find to be true is right...

            

thoughtful unrest

What life was before stricken into grievance, So Full and desirably infatuating.

Lead on a coarse of thrilling moments strung together like the ropes of hope.

Living for what was most important inside that which we claim to be our hearts.

Only now have I seen the realization of this hollow which repeats such horrors and moments of atrocity , condemning my thoughts to relive times of failure.

Such a fickle thing this burdensome beast inside my chest.

Pulling the strings attached to which make me feel so whole, or not so.

Bipolar are its thoughts toward my well-being.

Loving my desires in a moment of trust and then reveling in the eternal time to which I'm at a loss for what was my happiness.

Upon this plane that is our lives, it is life that is against our very existence and woe to you who believe otherwise.

Disappointment waits for you at your doorsteps.  

                                                         

the loss of something once held, my dear

Amazement fills the crevices of a barren and dry land that once breathed vitality.

The ending of things once held in such concrete security are scattered across the pedestal.

A Sacred place of love and the dreams to hope inside its safety is dissolved in a single moment.

The questions all end with why.

My thoughts blur into a single state of mind, the one of my personal being and its worth to your intentions.

It seems not only have I been deprived of a love, but of a friendship that was close to my heart.

Pain is worse when coupled into partnership.

How crippled i am into the end of loneliness.

Missing you won't bring you back...

                                                            

For a love that isn't there...

If all the hurt was the hurt we gave one another.

If all the pain and silent thoughts of grief were for no better than from two misguided hearts.

If  all the sorrow and the dreams that have been broken were for nothing.

If all my love is on the floor, tread upon so easily, and all for the other.

If my hopes for your gain are nothing better than the unliving drifting shallowly under the very top of these waters.

The unspoken rebuke of dis-ease hidden in your eyes that are far from my perception,

I long for a time of peaceful laughter shown in the smile of your sight.

In the end will this be as the beginning was?

Why do i fight in words unsaid for nothing short of a dial tone.

Why do i try to please the one who i believe is in dispute against my very heart?...

I suppose this too will pass with my soul on the undertone and the victor's heart not captured by the other.

There is no trophy to be won from this round.

                                                

a famous writer wrote this not sure who though but good stuff

When so many are lonely that seem to be lonely it would be inexcusably selfish to be lonely alone

A daft life of fear

 

Many people die with their music within them.

To often it Is because they are always getting ready to live. 

Before they know it their time has been spent...

To live is not to pull the drapes of fortitude around your heart, willing it unable to be shattered.

A cold solace of false protection decays that very vital organ with self contained pains and doubts within your own being.

Indeed whoever said that living is not for the faint of heart was correct.

Truely living and with happiness requires a bravery and a longing for more than self preservation.

Letting go the binding ropes that hold your fortress securely adrift.

That is when life becomes more real yes, and with reason only some can say but to experience.

Meaning To Be Dreamt

 

In dreams sorrows flee, things that were once so far from your grasp are now comfortably close to your countenance.

 Live free, live hard, live for love.. 

Just know, that which was in your heart and is now in the openness of your mind will be but a blur of drowsy joy once you’ve woken from the place you long to be.

 Sleep